I am truly relearning so much about life, about the excitement of being IN life true my grandson. This morning tho, I am realizing how much more I am learning in Being here and why. Even with the absolute synchronicity of having just written about the various functions of the brain, which is still very fresh in my own brain of understanding. We are wired, energetically, to be together. To live together, to feel each others needs and to thrive together in the Wholeness of Love.
For now the whole world is too large a landscape to think about, instead, the world at large is so incredibly reflecting all of our own dysfunctions, our own fears of separation back to us. But if we scale this all down to a community. But, I am ahead of myself in this sharing, let me back up for a moment. I have watched the first two days with my grandson the fear of being away from his dad, even if his dad is in the other room, build almost to the feeling of terror. By day three of me being here and interacting with my grandson, I started to feel his terror turn to calm and trust. Obviously you can’t talk or reason with a 2 year old, you can only be the reflective presence of what they need to feel secure. Aren’t we Being that for each other, thru our sharings with each other, our support of each other. We have already started to be “that” to take each other thru the greatest change of our lives, which I refer to as spiritual empowerment.
Keep in mind. so many of us, the world’s population, still has the two year old in charge of their lives. The fear, the anxiety, the learned distrust of those around him or her. For the last two days I have been babysitting while my son went to work. This has been an interesting and wonderful time to really see how application changes everything. I realized there are only two things on this little boys mind at any given time; his dad and playtime, and in that order. He will forego any playtime if for a moment he thinks he won’t see his dad… at least sometime soon.
Again, I can so understand this in relationship to us. We all want the freedom in life to play, to do what is fun and enjoyable in our lives. That dad icon is different things to different people; a divine counterpart, a joyful job, a trusted friend… you can fill in the blank with whatever makes your heart soar, but beyond play there is another tangible aspect within us that would go hand in hand with that freedom of play. For me personally, that other has become You. Granted the guise of who “You” were changed many times over the span of this journey, but not once was I ever without a “You” in my life (from the start of this drastic and life changing journey.) You have allowed me to feel safe at every twist and turn. Often times, you provided food, shelter, warmth where I could not find any in the outside world. You gave me a shove as I attempted to go higher on the ladder of ascension. You were more crucial than I think I even realized during my first 3-4 years of growth, of empowerment on this path. You are still a very needed and desired partner on my life’s journey. I have strived to be “that” to you as well.
It is so funny (not haha funny) to bear witness to my time with my grandson and the core teachings of my lifetime/master guide Ramus. Again, until this morning, I couldn’t even have told you why I was here and what was really happening. Ramus is what many would call a master guide, he has been with me thru the life planning before incarnating and has stayed by my side to even right now and will be there when I cross back over to the clear side of the veil. His core teachings to me is that action speaks louder than words. During my first 8 years of meditation, he was always present, each and every time, he just never said a damn thing to me. It was Jill, who became a guide as I went thru my divorce in ’95, who told me that the reason he never talks to me is to teach me about the importance of actions beyond words. 8 years later his first words to me were “you finally got it.” Damn I am slow!! lol This path, this spiritual journey is not about knowing stuff at all (altho that helps a lot, especially as we embark on the next leg of this adventure.) It is about applying what we have learned into a way of Being. Not just what is easy to apply, but every aspect at every time.
So what my grandson needed from me was calm and to trust in that calm place within our now combined energy fields. The first day his daddy went to work, he asked many times during the course of the day where his daddy was, I would not say the word work, because he would melt down from it, instead I would just assure him he will be back later and we can play until he came back. We played long and hard together all day long. He was finding that calm place within himself even while separated from his beloved daddy. When his daddy finally pulled into the driveway after work, there was a love explosion taking place within his little body and a trust in a grandma who assured him all day long that his daddy would be back.
Yesterday, he only asked a few times but from a place of wondering and not fear. The moment I simply stated we are going to play until daddy gets home from work, I got a happy “OK” and went on to play together. I realized his trigger words of “daddy + work” equaled an emotional melt down. I didn’t want to avoid those words at all, but find a way to make it a calm and enjoyable experience for him, where he can trust that daddy will indeed return from work to hug and love and play with him again.
We all have those triggers within us. Emotionally embedded words that create an emotional reaction to our external world. It really is less the event itself, but what the word we have attached to the event that creates our reactions and what we feel about that. Turning whatever “that” is into a positive is key. I know I can sound like a really broken record with this, but I just don’t know how we can find these little bites of information within us that is still so emotionally charged and affecting our present moment without meditation.
Now here is an interesting thought coming thru; what if so many of these embedded emotions were past life issues we came here to resolve? We really do not need to go traipsing thru hundreds of lifetimes to deal with “it,” we really just have to understand where it embedded within us in this lifetime and defuse it from that moment. Now on the positive side of the child within every one of us, talk about living in the moment!!
As I watch and interact with my grandson it is like every moment is the first big, exciting moment of his life. It doesn’t matter if we already played baseball three other times that day, time number four is filled with the same excitement, the same emotion as the first three times prior. Every plane that goes by in the sky (my son lives 3 miles from airport so the planes fly close to the ground for landing and take off) is as exciting as the one that went by 3 minutes ago. We must drop what we are doing and point with excitement to the plane going over head. Hell, most of the time, I don’t even notice they exist, but he doesn’t miss a thing!
I actually started to become envious of his presence in this world. So wide-eyed and excited. I started wondering… when did I lose my love affair with created life? Granted, I do love life (now) but nowhere near like he does… but I want to!! I can feel his entire energy field expand and open up to bring him more things to be excited about.
But what is even more than that, our energy fields have linked up in a way I suppose I always knew they should or could…. and had the experience with my youngest daughter starting on that mountainside in Vermont, but even then, I was still a baby on this path and did not fully understand what was happening then like I do now.
This is where the community relationship becomes so important and why so many of our hearts have longed for such a community. We are social creatures, but more than that, we are consciously connected to each other. I can feel him when he is thirsty, but if feels very much like my own thirst. I can sure feel him when he gets tired, it feels like my own tired. I can feel him when he explodes in joy when his father pulls into the driveway from his day at work, it feels like my joy! This is really how we are meant to live, when we feel thirst, everyone gets a drink! We celebrate together, we cry and uplift each other together. This really takes in the phrase “what you do unto others, you do unto me as well.” (ok, that is probably paraphrased.)
This is one huge reason why the journey of ascension is about becoming new again, dying to the old life and living in a whole new life. Digging up all those old root systems that kept us connected to our families and their hurts and pains, from the past lives we brought into this life to let go of It was all crucial to get each and every one of us to here, but will not get us to “there.”) To replant ourselves into a system of wonder and excitement. Of caring for each other as we care for ourselves. Imagine the power a of a community based in pure love, in unconditional love would produce.
With all my heart I so wish I could tape what I see beyond the construct of created reality, the energy fields themselves, the trees, the grass, everything explodes into abundant joy in living purely in the moment without worries. Everything changes. Everything. The amplification of the energy that has always been present…. beyond even my imagination!!
We, the human race, are an extraordinary species barely touching the pure potency of our full potential. Each day we move closer to that Equinox time (Sept. 22nd) we are amping up with our hearts desires each day, our next created expression. I am so so grateful my energy is now bouncing off and with a 2 year olds pure joy of Being in Life and embracing every aspect of Love within it.
My grandson is no longer melting down with the words daddy + work, not because of anything I said, but because of what I do… play, play, play and reassure daddy will be home and hugging you!
I remember a period of time in early 2002, my spiritual team would play over and over again the song “He ain’t heavy, he’s my brother.” This came up when the spiritual forum I belonged to then started to talk about our responsibility with others in our lives. I don’t mean teaching them spiritual understandings, but helping in any way we can. The prominent thought was, let them figure it out. My team always reminded me that there is not a person on earth that is also “me” and what would I do to help myself? If I am ignoring you, then I have helped no one. (This was an added paragraph obviously important to spirit to include!)
Well, there is so much more I would love to share from my greatest teacher in my present moment, but he will be waking up soon and I will be busy playing! I am going to Pennsylvania tomorrow to re-meet my father (after close to 4 decades apart) and my siblings created by him and I know I will not do another sharing until I am Back In Virginia (next sharing will be Monday.)
To each and everyone one of you that made this two-week adventure possible for me, thank you from the depths of my soul. Thank you so much for watering the roots of my soul! I love you!!