How often do we really allow ourselves to strip down to our bare essence? I will never forget the time while living on the mountainside in Vermont, walking completely naked outside to my medicine wheel. The first thing I felt was shame and exposed. How on earth can I keep a secret without clothes on my body? In truth, I couldn’t. There I was, in all my vulnerability for all the universe to see as I tip-toed to my medicine wheel in the back yard.
There is something very safe, very protective as we clothe ourselves in material matter… homes, jobs, relationships, right down to the very clothes on our backs. It really allows us to hide from ourselves. Often times we hide for so long in the depth of material reality, we have long forgotten who we really are… and why.
That single day in my life changed me forever. There is a tremendous freedom in laying yourself bare for all the world to see and feel. Not only does it free you from your own restrictions, it allows you to feel all you have ever kept away from you as well.
How many of you really know what your passion in this life is? How many of you that do know what your passion is, understand what the real motivation deep within is for that passion?
This was the theme of the universe yesterday for the precious hearts I read for. Strip completely down, get out of any aspect of matter that fills your passion or lack there of… and feel what is really happening deep within.
I am going to end this sharing with an exercise to do just that. It is way to important not to do! It seems we have a 2 week gateway (closing… or opening depending on your view) that takes up to the 28th of April.
I had 4 readings yesterday, as I reflect back on all of them right now I notice something really important. 3 out of 4 people were completely black, in silhouette form. The only one I had difficulty getting information for is the one who was not in silhouette, which was my first reading of the day, and the very place I got the exercise I will leave you with from.
We have gone thru a 3 day full on energy change on earth. An energy so pure that it links directly to the heart and produces the energy that exists between your heartbeats immediately. I think the only way to offer a true example is by my own experience.
April 12th is what I call the creamy middle of the oreo cookie of change. It take s 3 full earth days for complete change to go from start to finish. So day 2 always reminds me in taste and feel of what the change is all about.
So many of us awoke that day in pure feeling. Many in joyful, exhilarating feelings, others… not so much. Whatever you were feeling this day, was your core energy revving up to be a full and intense part of your next version of created reality.
For me personally, I was hit with joy overwhelming first, eventually coupled with love and gratitude… all from the inside out and wrapped around me like a cozy blanket.
After my day of readings, I simply sat with it all… all the pure, intense feelings moving thru me and dancing with the beat of my heart. I started to pay attention to everything in my world, in my life.
I had talked to my son on the phone for a while, and when we hung up, I thought about family. Parent and child. How much I love and cherish my children. I then thought about my own parents. It was a really strange thought let me tell you. I have not had contact with my mother since 1996, and have not had any contact with my father since 1976. One could think I have been parent-less for a long time… but that was so not the feeling I was sitting in. I felt so completely enriched because of my parents, or really, lack there of.
In all my life I so wanted a role model I could emulate my life after. Going into meditation and meeting with my guides Jill and Ramus, they became the foundation of my life. They were kind, loving, non-judgmental, non-critical and never abandoned me when I went into meditation bitching about life (which I did quite often.) They were always there to welcome me back when I would be so freakin angry with the world that I cut meditation out of my life (never for more than a week at a time… but a week can feel like an eternity when your pissed at the very thing you love most,)
The offered wisdom only when I was ready to really receive it, and smiled with their loving energy when I was not.
I have since became a living aspect of their unconditional love.
I was so filled with gratitude for my parents, for allowing me the fullness of my experiences on earth. I was filled with a peace, a loving gratitude I never recognized for them before.
So the next day, as I was doing my first reading and she showed up in her South garden, representing summer, full bloom of all the energy in her life and really really understanding what is growing in there and most importantly… why!
When I was talking to my client and she was frustrated because all she passionately wants in life just doesn’t seem to be arriving for her… we had to look at not so much the garden of her life, but the root system under the earth.
Why do you really want this or that… what is really looking for expression. She started to hit on something very important, I felt it immediately. She loves beautiful clothes, beautiful homes, interior design that radiates beauty. Ohhh the wheels in my heart started clicking, not only for her… but for me too!!
Remember my story of creation… and creator exploding into every color of the rainbow and each color held a core energy within it. One of the pure aspects of love is beauty. That what she came to earth to be a living example of. But… as this material plane so often does… she wants to express it thru, clothes, homes, interior design… etc. So what really needs to be understood by her is…. why? Why do you really want this? Lets first strip away all the mundane aspects of your hearts desire… what is really there?
I thought of my hearts desire to go to Israel for my 50th birthday in August. For the first time ever, I asked myself… why? Of course, the mundane cloud says, well Jesus walked around there, I discovered his written truth in the Dead Sea Caves and want to re-experience that… feel with that outside of my bathtub. I suddenly realized the only reason I so seek to feel Israel under my feet is to have a way to reconnect with family again. He lived. I knew where.
I also thought about my desire to live in a community of like hearts and like vibrations. Under that crazy root system was the same feeling of why I wanted to be in Israel… family. To be near and with people who love and support you no matter what. To come together for a greater good beyond ourselves, beyond the neediness that so many relationships hold.
As I concluded my day of mind altering, life changing readings… I came to fully understand these next 2 weeks are filling us all with that which we amplify out of our core. Each day thru the next 2 weeks, life will be reflecting back to you what is deeply in your core. You will have a choice each and every moment to embrace it with the fullness of your vibration or remove it so something new can grow. All of which creates the full on energy of May thru the next year (as spirit said thru several of the readings yesterday… this is an incredible opportunity for all of life.
I sat on my couch processing the magnitude of what came thru… and I got a friend request come thru my phone for facebook. My heart stopped. Her last name is Parkhurst. That is my maiden name.
It is funny really, to think of how much we bury ourselves in clothes to hide. When I got divorced in 1995 my attorney asked me if I wanted to take back my maiden name. I said no. I told her I didn’t want to do the paperwork involved in changing it back. When you lie long enough… you believe it deep enough.
Truth is, it hurt. By keeping my last name Gawlas I didn’t ever have to be reminded of a father I so desperately wanted to love… but couldn’t. Not because he was unwilling. He sought me out when I was in my late 20′s. He sent someone to my home and asked for my forgiveness and to please come back to his life. I was busy being angry and slammed the door shut, denying the girl inside who sooooo wanted to say YES! We humans can be stubborn to our own detriment and then blame it all on someone else. I was the master of the blame game!!
When I awoke yesterday, I knew something in life forever changed. I woke up so completely empty. Not in a negative way, but in a fully open way. Think of your closets… we stuff so much things inside them that when something new comes along, there is no more room left to hold it.
I really felt like as I slept thru the night, all my closets were emptied completely out. It actually felt good and weird at the same time. The more I did readings, the more I understood the silhouette imagery and how utterly important it is to allow yourself to be in that place. Completely empty and open to the new and incoming abundance of energy.
The moment I had seen the Parkhurst name, I went to my computer to open facebook. I didn’t recognize her first name so I had to go snooping around. I found a name on her profile I did recognize… my paternal brother. I could only think… holy shit! Does she realize who I am? I sent her a little message just incase she didn’t… really…. just incase she wanted to close the door.
36 years has gone by since I had any contact with this leg of my family tree.
It is funny really how we can assume everyone acts and thinks the same. My mother denies to everyone she has children or grandchildren, it is her safety mechanism and I can honor that. I suppose in the place that was deep inside me, I just assumed my father and his 5 children did the same.
Spirit has a very strange way of making sure you notice something in the very moment you need to notice it and not one second before its time!
I found on my brothers profile where he gave a shout out to his sister for Easter. I never knew any of the girls (there are 4) last names… they change with marriage obviously. I followed his shout out to her profile… I wasn’t on her facebook page a whole minute when an instant message popped up at the bottom of my facebook screen from her saying she was my sister and they have been looking for me for years.
The synchronicity was so weird… how do I get a message from her the very moment I am looking at her profile? I responded back in utter shock…
It seems she actually sent me that very message that popped up on my screen as an instant message on Thursday. How on earth could that be?? I never got it until that very moment… I had read all the messages in my facebook since then, and hers was not there until the very moment I was on her screen. When I looked back at all my messages in facebook and the dates…. sure enough, that initial message had a date stamp of Thursday the 12th. The day of the creamy middle energy of change!! The day I loved my parents soooo much that loving peace was the only thing I could feel with them. Freedom from longing.
And on the very first day of this new energy, my life irrevocably changed forever. Love and excitement of reunion was pouring into my life from a family long removed… that I personally held in exile… until the very moment I let that go.
I don’t believe I need to go to Israel for my birthday, but a place much closer, much fuller… Tunkhannock, PA!
In these days, our deepest most precious dreams are bursting with life and arriving in the pure space of your heart. Get completely naked and Live!
Steps to Getting Naked:
Each step of this exercise should be written in a journal so you can really reflect on the entirety as you move thru each step. Do not judge a thing! There is no right or wrong, pass or fail. There is only utter truth in feeling.
Take a long moment and really look at all that is growing in the garden of your life. What is really there? Now ask yourself, why is it really there? What do you feel deep inside of you with each thing, each person that is in your life.
Now look at the things that are not in your life. Why are they not there? Do you have room in your garden for them to be there?
Now take a full look at the garden of your life and remove every single mundane aspect of it. No people, just energy fields of people. No things, just the energy of the things… what do you feel inside of you now.
if there is any sort of unpleasant feeling… go deeper. Fully understand why you “need” this energy to feel whole in the garden of your life.
When you get to the core feelings… free it. Set you and them/that free.
For those that do have a passion within you: Feel with the deepest aspect of your heart. What is really trying to come to life thru you. Do not give it material clothes. Taking my client above… you can never be the true expression of beauty by wearing a fancy outfit… but if you feel beautiful when wearing one… put it on and really understand why you feel that way when wearing a facade. What is the real core energy of your heart revealing to you. Now imagine there is a life with no facade, nothing you can wear or live within to feel that… how do you bring that expression out of your heart and into your life.
Keep that there… live in that feeling every day. Follow the energy path to where ever it leads you to. This will bring you to the fully manifested version of your passion made manifest.
Your dreams have been waiting forever for you to become clear… and are rushing towards you for fulfillment the moment you are fully naked and true.
For those still seeking your passion: Take each and every aspect of your life’s garden and imagine your life with nothing in it. Nothing that can ever hide you from you again. How do you feel in your own energy field. What feelings come up thru you as you stand alone, unsheltered in your garden of life? Move deeper into that feeling, really understand what you are feeling and why. Do you feel free or anxious? If you feel anxious or anything other than free… go deep into that feeling and understand why it is there… what are you really afraid of? It becomes free the moment you hit your truth.
Once any and all negative feelings are freed, now feel what your hearts garden feels like. What is the strongest feeling rising to the surface to find fulfillment in your world? Keep it there, follow the energy of it into your next moment. Let it be your guide forward and you will find you walk straight into the passion, the purpose of your life…. because it too has been waiting for you to arrive, clear and open.
This is your freedom, your doorway to the bliss of your heart desires. Strip down and be FREE!!!
I so love you all, so so so much!! You are truly the wind beneath my wings.
Lisa Parkhurst Gawlas www.mysoulcenter.com/energy_readings.html