I awoke today with my own wake up call. As I lay in bed the thoughts and feelings kept rolling through me. Yesterday I had a day like I’ve never had before. The evening before Bob and I went to look at a vehicle to buy from someone in the area. We liked it tremendously and found the owners to be very much in tune with us, wonderful people. We came to an agreement on the vehicle and that started the whole process for me of accessing some of my innermost feelings about different things in my life.
I didn’t realize the depth of it until this morning. I will give you the info about what has taken place in my life recently. A few days ago I received in my bank the inheritance from my mother, who passed over almost two years ago. The feelings of what will happen when a gift like this is all gone came over me. I was feeling, what will I do for extra money when the gift from my mother and father is all gone. There are no more sources of these kinds of funds waiting in the wings for me. Oh, I’d better be careful how I spend the rest of the money that is such a beautiful gift to me. Do I deserve it?
Yes, I certainly do. I’ve spent my whole life being careful about spending. Be careful; don’t spend too much on this, or that. Do you really need this; do you deserve that? Of course you do, I said then and so many times. Still the feelings came up from time to time. Was it because it was true, or because people told you it was. Or was it because people told you that you don’t deserve it, maybe not in words, but in actions.
This whole scenario of how I had been so careful throughout my life about money kept revealing itself as I lay there in bed. I began to realize what it was representing to me. I was at a place now where I could keep this inside me, or go and talk with Bob about it. So I told him. It wasn’t easy at first, but as the words and reality of it all came through I realized that I was giving myself a valuable gift in being able to talk it out of my beingness. I knew that because I was hearing my own words, feeling the feelings as they processed through me, that I was getting past it. I would be able to go on from here and manifest all that I desire and intend for my life.
It felt so right and so good. I won’t have to feel that I must struggle anymore on that old level that kept popping up. I can now recognize it when it may come up again, and talk my way past it with self-love. In that way, the bounty will keep coming for me. This gift from Mom and Dad isn’t the last one that will come in my life. I have followed it with my own gift to myself that is opening all the doors that I’ve kept closed.
Then a little later when I took my shower to begin the day, the deeper truth came flowing over me in the particles of water that always gave me a gift. I knew that this was part of what is holding humanity from receiving the gifts that are being offered by The Creator and all of the Family of existence. In one way or another humanity is holding back because of the past ‘mistakes’ that have been being expressed throughout this duality experience. We are holding back all of that which we deserve because in so many ways we feel on some level that we don’t deserve it. We must struggle to get by, to say nothing about being able to ‘more than get by’. We deserve to have our lives easy and effortless. But we allow our old feelings of guilt, anxiety, etc to come in the way of allowing the gifts of love to flow forth freely.
What say we let go of all those feelings! How about putting to rest all of the thoughts we have on a subconscious level, and admit that we don’t need to hang on to them to be able to deserve a better life! We have given all of existence a tremendous gift, and now it is time to let go of all that came through as a result of agreeing to this duality experience. It is time to let go, dear Family. We are being offered so much Love and Light and riches of Life. Let’s let go and take a ride in the new vehicles that will spin us around in a joyful way and get us back to ourselves. I can feel Cassie (our new-coming doggie) wagging her tail in joy because I’ve let go of the feeling that maybe I don’t deserve for her to come back to me in her new form all well and happy and ready for the next ride through life and fun. We all deserve that, so come on and ride through it with me. We more than deserve it; we create it in our Love for ourselves, and all of existence.
Thank you dear Ones,
Love Nancy Tate
Reblogged this on Blue Dragon Journal.