I remember last year, as spirit talked about this first quarter of 2014 as a brand new school/university never before had on earth, they skipped the part about hell week. Like any worthy school (kidding about the worthy part) of higher learning, there is an initiation into the “sorority.” They key is, not to mention the only obligation, is to survive.
I am doing my best!
If I thought Sunday evening was rough, Wednesday even was worse. Maybe it was because I couldn’t afford all the medicines the ER folks prescribed for me, namely: an abuterol inhaler to keep my airways open and a cough suppressant to ease the constant quaking within my chest. The total cost at Walgreen’s was $160 for my four prescriptions, I had $70. With the help of the pharmacist, we prioritized: predisone (a steroid to quickly reduce inflammation) and the antibiotic to target the bacterial bronchitis and hoped for the best.
I felt so good on Monday, I was able to do readings with joy, 6 of them no less!! But really, they all gave me tremendous insight in the days that lay ahead. Especially my second lady of that day, her reading, her energy, her love has stayed with me even thru this moment. Maybe it is because in less than 24 hours after our first ever reading together, flowers…. daisy’s of many colors were delivered to my front door, well, delivered to my landlady’s door and she brought them over to me, mentioning this is a first for the Mesa. We live in the middle of no man’s land with no florist in sight. Well, 1-800-flowers gets the job done via fed ex!! How extraordinary. Let me share the DeLight with you:
My landlady also gave me a stern talking to about not asking her for help when I needed to go to the ER. I was surprised she even knew about that. A local friend read my blog then called her to check on me.
By Tuesday the wellness I was feeling on Monday started to slip away, my voice was becoming raspy again due to the coughing especially during the night. When my landlady came to check on me again (and again, and again…smile) by Wednesday she was putting on her thinking cap hard on how to get me that abuterol inhaler. Between her and I, both of our finances are in the fires of resurrection, the ash stage of it…
I was too strained in my own body to really notice her concern about my own deterioration. Then she called a beautiful friend who has a local “intenders group” and instantly she had said she could manifest the money to get my inhaler. By this time tho, it was late in the day, Walgreens is a 2 hour round trip ride… I can wait til morning. Both my landlady and our wonderful friend asked me repeatedly if they could go fetch my medicine, I had no desire, no energy to get dressed and go anywhere and I surely wasn’t sending anyone else out to do that for me. (My own strength and independence can actually be my worst enemy at times. Note to self, stop that!! lol) So she gave me the money to get it taken care of in the morning.
I went into the depths of my physical hell Wednesday night. My coughing started early, shortly after dark and remained constant until I passed our from sheer exhaustion about 4 am. My ability to breathe was more diminished Thursday morning than it was Sunday night. Screw the pharmacy, I am going to the local clinic since they are open. I think I was way past the abuteral helping me.
By this point, I had zero voice left and it took all the breath I had in me just to tell the lady on the phone I need to be seen. She didn’t even ask why, just gave me an appointment for an hour from that moment.
Thank God I have a really strong heart, and I know it is due in large part, because YOUR love is so embedded in me, that you truly do hold me together in my moments of weakness. A depth of gratitude I could never repay. But my blood oxygen was low, at least to me. It was only 93%. My doc said that is not bad for a smoker, I whispered it is for this smoker. I just went thru a 2 month journey with my dad and he and I and some of my sisters would check out our own blood oxygen with his gadget and mine was always 98-99% when my dads was consistently 95-96% (even on the hospital ones.) She was surprised to hear that and by the look on her face, I don’t think she believed me. But then again, I have long stopped buying into mass belief about ….anything.
One whirl on the breathing machine and my lungs were already starting to sing the hallelujah chorus. I was actually surprised that when my treatment was finished, there was a raspy audibleness to my voice. Even tho I was as incredible sore as a body could get from pelvic to head (all due from intense couching) as one could be, I suddenly realized something about our actual breathe, without enough oxygen coming thru the airways, voice cannot happen.
This little clinic, in the midst of nowhere, made sure I had all I needed to restore my health. A new antibiotic, more prednisone, an abuteral inhaler and a cough suppressant with codeine to make sure I slept thru the night, all for under $45 and postponed me paying for the office visit and treatment until Monday. You would think gratitude would have been my first feeling, but it wasn’t. I was pissed. All this for $45????? Why on earth was Walgreens charging me $160 for less medicine? She just looked at me and said, “because you don’t have insurance.” With this clinic, I was on a sliding scale payment fee.
I did recognize something huge Wednesday evening, prior to my descent into biological hell… All this week I having been checking every crevice of my closet to see if there was any lingering negative emotions, something I just didn’t deal with to date and could find nothing. Wednesday evening, as this precious lady was standing in my livingroom with concern in her face and money for my drugs in her hand, I realized what was right with this profound moment. The love that surrounds me. The desire to help and assist. Granted, I have seen this, felt this, experienced this pretty much for the last 4 months consistently thru all of YOU, but there is something that happens when you gaze into the actual eyes of something and really see and feel the love of God standing before you, knowing this is the greatest divine mirror of all of life. In that moment, I stopped looking for what is wrong within me.
I pretty much slept all day Thursday and off an on thru the night Thursday evening. For the first time, completely free of the burden of feeling I must be out of balance with myself. Just upon waking Friday morning, during my sleep time, my own spiritual team took me to a classroom of sorts. I was watching on a holographic screen the earth changes that have taken place since the inception of earth herself. The earthquakes, the tsunami’s, the volcano’s, raging storms all giving birth to new land masses, new bodies of water, creating new elements within our periodic table. Earth herself has been in a constant state of change since her beginning. So has all life that has ever had the privilege to live upon her back.
Because of the humans deep survival instinct, which comes from the lower brain and is there very much on purpose, we tend to get scared when something HUGE shifts upon the earth. Even thru today, many gather together to stop any foreseen big event because we see the loss of potential life and sustainability in any given area. We do this with each other as well.
In these last 10+ years, the earth has undergone many large changes, as needed for the greater good of All, and many people gather in prayer and sending “healing” to the earth, which actually has an adverse affect on the progress. The progress stalls, only to have to start up again later and more powerful than the first time around had it been allowed to complete itself.
Our biology is going thru this same massive shift/change. Old cells that carried us to hear, releasing themselves thru what feels like earthquakes within the body, massive runoff of fluids, the tsunami’s of change. Changing the periodic table’s makeup within our old carbon self into the pure crystalline version we had worked so hard to become.
My second lady of the day on Monday… her entire reading is held steadfast in my heart, my minds eye.
She showed up on the field in the deep west, near the Mesa itself in two quadrants, the left side (for her, it was representing all of her previous mysteries of all collective lifetimes) and her right side (all future lives and the attained wisdom coming into her center.) The left side was shown as a daisy, very much like the daisy lady I had seen sitting, waiting in her east field two days prior. But my new lady had her stem as if it was cut from an old world and she was suspended in air. She had the radiation of deep colors on all of her petals, showing that she is using the mastery of her collective lives, but in the present moment, at a pause point as earth herself ignites in readiness for the new human collective that is well underway.
In her right quadrant was another flower stem, but this time, with the flower head being a large heart…. the heart of gaia herself. The two becoming one. This is actually more profound and more important than we really realize, or at least, that I have realized until yesterday.
We have spent so many lifetimes, countless lifetimes really, mastering the old earth energy, where healing, and sickness went hand in hand. But here we are, on an earth we can call heaven made manifest where sickness cannot exist. And really, knowing which earth you have set yourself up upon is key. If you are on the new earth and you send anything of the new earth “healing” it is like sending toxins to an emerging eco-system and yet, the law of karma prevails, what you put out is what you get back.
Let me step into this thought a little further. I had spent the last 13 years working with energy, moving out the old, infusing the new and so many other things that was great for getting me/us to Here, but, as my own body showed me this last week, is a detriment to Being Here Now.
Our very breath, the elements that make up an “oxygen” so pure, so rarefied that we have never seen such a thing on this playing field before, must be relearned in use and application. Our lungs are now releasing a whole new vibration into the atmosphere, coupled with the suns releasing of the magnetosphere of new and the earth, OMG the earth is in whole-y wonder. One breathe released is like 100 breathes last year. What emotion is held in that breathe, which happens to emerge from the heart field, is what is amplified back to you, to us, as we form this new collective of Pure Love made manifest.
If you can make it untainted, unbiased LOVE, only love. No need to feel like something needs healing or saving, or rescuing, just pure love of life will allow us all to be the active midwives thru this incredible change. Actually, a wet nurse. We have birthed the new world, but like a baby, it needs care and love and pure food energy. LOVE. And we are both the parent and the child AND the new earth in which it all lives upon.
I woke up yesterday with a little more breathe to be had, still winded when I suddenly get up and do something, but easier than it has been. Talking still very much a strain that causes coughing, so I am knee-deep in the “silent zone.” About noon time this feeling started to swirl around me… a trip down to the river. I thought, my god, walking 10 feet to my kitchen sink winds me, going 100 feet to the river is going to cripple me. I put it off.
The feeling got stronger and more directive. I am in the center point of my own change, the old completely gone, the new still imbuing within me, to go to the river for prayer, for ceremony. The first thing I had seen and felt was the cut daisy’s on my coffee table. Take an orange one to represent the womb of earth, take a yellow one to represent the souls new flight upon the new earth. To take one of my fathers turkey feathers to represent our ancestors who gave their ALL to get us to Here. A morning dove feather that I picked up from the field (backyard) to represent ALL those Here Now and my most sacred crystal to give back to the earth all that she has given to me thru our intimate exchanges.
A beautiful friend on facebook said she was “breathing with me” and I decided to use her energy, her breath to take me to the river with ease (Thanks Melissa… wink.) I gathered the things and really wanted to wear my fathers Indian garb, but didn’t have the energy to change out into it. The shirt, tho beautiful, is not that easy to get into or out of.
As I got to the river and found a place for this gift to life, about 3 feet away from my dream that had the meteor impregnated in the earth near the river, the prayerful words flowed from my heart as if they have been there a lifetime just waiting for this moment. Each element placed in the earth had an evocation and reverence that even surprised me as it bellowed from my heart. My final arrangement looked like this:
The quartz cluster behind the arrangement I had gathered insisted on being part of this energy. I had brought it down to the river early last year and had survived the flooding and rains, when all my other crystals and rocks went downstream. As I stood up to look and feel with the energy I had just placed in the ground, I actually stepped on the cluster crystal and felt its desire, its need to be part of this energy mix. It represents all of us who have gathered in the fields of prayer, of readings and connections to facilitate this profound transition unfolding.
I planted the orange into the earth and the yellow daisy, representing the freedom of soul express to ALL that are Now Here, gathered the energy and I threw it down the river to spread in free flow to ALL:
Again, the words, the pure feeling energy that came thru my heart in sacred prayer, surprised me. I cannot tell you what the words were, they came thru me as opposed to from me, but I felt the energy, the love and expansion with every beat of my heart.
I watched the river take the yellow daisy of our souls birth into the new world, downstream and out of my eye’s view. As I returned my gaze to the top of the mesa, from what I would call deep west, behind the Mesa top itself, and just to the right (our future) two amazing red-tailed hawks started their own sacred dance with each other in the sky. The moment my eyes, my heart made contact with these amazing creatures, an explosion of tears, of deep inner sobs erupted. I couldn’t control myself, or my ability to breathe thru the sobs (btw, my walk to the river…. effortless!!) I sat on my little tree stump, one of the only other things to have survived the flooding last year. I had two tree stumps there, one for when my blue-eyed man showed up, but it was one of the first things to have washed away. Only my seat dug in to the river bank.
I tried like hell to get a picture of these two birds in sacred flight with each other, I was only able to capture one of them at a time:
They were flying in figure eight style so high in the sky it was hard for me to make them out. I asked if they could come closer so I could identify them and their reply was what they are didn’t matter, that they represent the fact that “the return of the bird tribes is Here Now,” and with that expansion in my heart, the fly back behind the mesa cliff, and my sobs started all over again. More of a deep inner knowing, an expression of such profound love and gratitude and the knowing we have done what we set out to do.
I sat facing the Mesa, took a smoke out of my pack of smokes (don’t you dare judge me!! smile) in honor of our moment, held it up to the Mesa and all life and had a sacred smoke with the love of ALL, when suddenly I felt the presence of my father sitting to my left.
I have been in the presence of so many “ascended masters,” in the presence of the Presence itself, one would think being in the presence of my father would be as easy as pie… I lost it. I couldn’t hold myself together as this man now spirit sat next to me, still undecided on what form he wants to present to me (what he should look like to me) and in as deep a reverence with me for this sacred place, this sacred ceremony of life honoring life itself. But he finally really understood why I Am Here, as did I.
I started my walk back to my house, forever changed… and I noticed we had something strange happen. Big piles of the most softest dirt, loose and felt so powdery. It reminded me of when the Mesa exploded January 15th of last year, but it was all rich red dirt and only near the river.
I noticed something else too.
I have lived here now 2 years, and in all those two years, in what I call my immediate back yard, where I actually feed the birds several times a day, not once in all that time had there EVER been bird poop in or around anything in that circle area, which, in readings also represents the sacred center of ones life.
I am going to share a picture from several weeks ago (dec. 7th to be exact) that shows the gateway of what was to come (and is now Here) but also, that circle I call my backyard:
Now, there is bird poop all over everything, the table, the rocks, everything. What the hell?? The reply back… we have moved dimensions. We are now living in the full attributes of the field of expanded harvest, the deep west. We ARE the nuclear reactor/generator of Life living in biology.
Hmmmmm…. it is going to be interesting to see how much readings have changed, once breathing is easy again.
As I opened my back door to ponder all that just happened, my eyes caught an image in one of the panes of glass on my back door:
Every detail about this bird clear as day on my window, right down to a beak and individual feathers. My heart sunk thinking a bird must have flown at top speed into my window. I held my breath and went looking for the bird… none to be found. Not even a single feather. This bird size and even feather span did not look like any bird I am familiar with in the backyard and yet, it looked so flipping familiar. Thank god I share my story (strangeness lol) on facebook too, because one precious lady there gave me that deep AH-HA, when she mentioned it looked like a phoenix rising.
Well holy shit batman (pun very much intended lol) while I was sitting trying to maintain my connection with my father, he and all the life that is the Mesa talked about the transformation of the Phoenix and now it is plastered on my window pane.
The Phoenix and the much awaited “return of the bird tribes” are one and the same energy, expression. The phoenix did not return in the same body, the same form, nor have we… the winged ones.
But that is tomorrows sharing…
Before I close, I want to include an email I received from my daisy lady last evening. There is so much in her sharing, in our experience of yesterday, I am going to leave it untouched (by my words or additions) and allow it to permeate in its own energy and love to All:
Since the night after our first beautiful meeting (was that just 5 days ago?!), I’ve been graced with having the most interesting visuals– mostly at night, some during daytime fog-outs, haha
The first was that I semi-awoke around 4ish am with that elephant visual on my chest. (I was gonna say, “your elephant, but obviously it’s all of ours!). It was suspended about two inches above, actually, and i felt no weight from it.
I took a finger and guided it off and away– like it was suspended magnetically, ya know those trains in Europe (or somewhere) that glide above the rails? Then I proceeded to cough and cough and cough till I had a huge boatload of mucus-filled tissues next to me. I was so grateful and fell back asleep. Upon awakening, I remembered what had happened– and I’ll be darned if I did have an actual mountain of tissues….no floating elephant in sight, though, haha!
Then I read a bit where you shared how you’re feeling. From my work with Amma (thru Cathy Chapman), I have always liked to send Heart Holograms in matters like this– beautiful heart-filled, unobtrusive, love “telegrams” that are very gentle; the recipient can draw upon them as they feel appropriate–no bullish bombs, know what I’m sayin, mama?!
WELL… Talk about shifting since our time together! I go to drop into my Heart Source to send you one of these HHs, and I’ll be danged if, instead, I drop right down to the Crystal in Gaia’s core! What the what, am I doing here?! So I “get” that instead of traveling “up-top” to offer love vibes, I should connect down-under and offer them up to you from the Crystal Core! Very interesting, indeed!
So I imagine where you and the Mesa are, and gently release a vibe from my heart (and it’s amplified, because of the crystal)– to get thru all the dense layers, I’m assuming (?).
Then visual I got was that not only did it arrive to you, it also pushed up some bulbs. Imagine my surprise when I read on FB that you mentioned your popped-up buds, heehee. I saw them! And now a few hours later, i see your pix of the soil mounds! I am really digging this! (funny that i came up with the word digging) haha.
Lisa, I am in awe of these affirmations, the allowing, the finally-feeling-freakin connected…and with such a soulful group of awesome people that you’ve gathered here. And it has opened me up in a way I never expected… I am so so so tickled to be reunited with these aspects of myself and you and us
These last five days have been crazy-awesome– and I want to thank you again for YOU!
Espavo (as Steve Rother and the Group say)!!!
I love you all so incredibly much and am beyond grateful for your loving strength deep within my heart, the very fabric of my field of Life. Thank you as well, for enduring, with incredible patience, the intense “rescheduling” of these last several months. But it is ALL of us changing… together, as One.
((((HUGZ)))) filled with the deep unknown becoming known!!
Lisa Gawlas www.mysoulcenter.com/energy_readings.html